Broken road

We walked together, for miles. The road seemed to be never ending. But I didn't mind. His hands held me tight. I had no reason to complain. Shade and light, dusk and dawn, rotations and revolutions… One step at a time… We rarely spoke… There was nothing important to be said. Be and being. The sun never left the horizon and the moon longed to arrive. The ocean was far away. We heard the waves fight with the land. The battle was never ending.

As I closed my eyes, I heard him whisper my name. I turned to see in his direction. He was standing far away, staring at the distant horizon, at the edge of the cliff. I walked towards him. My footsteps filled the silence. I stood next to him. We were looking in the same direction. I smiled to myself and he caught a glimpse of me. He pulled me close to himself and held me closely. This is the most beautiful horizon I'll ever get to see, I told myself. He read my thoughts and held me tighter, almost embracing me. I rested my head on his shoulders. His hands comforted my head as I closed my eyes. No words were spoken. No words were needed. Nothing was to be heard. It was all known. Everything stood explained in that moment. And that moment lasted forever.

The sun drenched in the moonlight and everything below the sky glowed, like never before. A teardrop slowly trembled from my eye, rolling down the cheek. He held it in his palm and then looked deeply in my eyes.

"Lets lie down", he whispered.

I looked at the ground beneath our feet. An ocean of grass covered the moist earth. His arms were wide spread, his skin caressing the grass. His fingers embraced an ounce of earth. My head was resting over his chest, so close that I could hear every beat of his heart. I held him tight, not wanting to let him go. He didn't want to go away either. But one of us had to play wise about it. He broke the silence and the tear remained in my eye.

"Don't think too much… You know, I hate to see you this way…"

"All of this will soon be a dream… And I will be living this dream for the rest of my life…"

He didn't say anything. His grip hardened over me. The tears finally found their way out of my swollen eyes. My heart went numb with pain. His trembling shook my numbness. I knew that he was weeping from within. He took my left hand and caressed the ring that he'd given me.

My fingers were ice cold. The sky went darker as heavy clouds clearly hid the stars that were seen. Everything around us slowed down. Only time refused to pay heed to the rest of everything. Time never listens or hears.

The two of one

One heedless night,

Lovestruck, they stood.

So far away,

engulfed with shivers.

Borders to seek,

boulders to be kept.

The millstone of the world

never letting them near.

Studied eyes

and breathless wanderings.

The sore of the swell,

sinuous and pondering.

Alone in the swarm,

their souls - they met.

Wanting to tremble,

waiting to be swept.

How long to behold?

How much is to be seen?

Unknowing, they loved.

Not knowing, they lived.

The blur of the eye

for a lifetime to see.

So grim to speak,

ever widening and bleak.

The clasp of the lips

embossing the brazen skin.

The pill of sweat

kneaded the musk of skin.

Too far, too gone

with dreams that were born.

A lonely soldier

and the never ending war.

Reckless desires,

stumbling on pith.

Chosen surrender

and yet the bliss.

The never ending rotations

of endless nights.

With written promises

on the river, that flows.

A ghastly squall

groused beneath the earth.

Poor, wordless verdure

were rooted so firm.

Only if they could say,

only if they could hear.

All said and done.

All done and gone.

She and him (Inspired by Fyodor Dostoevsky's 'White Nights')

There he was,

forsaken and rapt.

No-one to see,

no-one to hear.

A world unseen

with words unsaid.

Quiver and trembling

his only guests.

By his bed,

the willow tree stood

veiling him away

by the rejected brook.

His angst and will -

the never ending scene.

The long haul

never dull, never gone.

There she was,

waiting for him.

So many words,

so many songs.

She wrote them all

with ink and blood.

The fervent yearning,

the directionless soul.

Clueless she sat,

by the river-side.

Not a word from him?

Not even a sigh?

The crease on the head

A tear was born.

The eternal lull -

waiting to be gone.

That dire night,

She saw a flame.

Her granny's locket

in the window, it chimed.

And then she knew,

it was a sign.

Cold, her hands

and feet, they stayed.

Didn't move an inch,

failed to sway.

Her fingers traced,

the molten wax

The over-whelming calm

of a starless sky.

Miles of darkness

No milestones to match.

Beneath his skin,

he felt the twitch.

Why didn't she come?

The shudder within.

The rain yelled, the brook

snarled and roared.

Who would hear?

He laughed to himself.

Drenched with distress,

submerged deep inside.

Killing the light,

without a sigh.

This is it,

this is the end.

He closed his eyes

and mumbled to himself.

By the window,

her endless wait.

Her dusty finger,

painting the pane.

She knew he'd come.

She'd seen the sign.

Pebbles on the road,

gleamed in the moonlight.

The hazy air

the moistened eye.

Between heartbeats

were missed breaths.

Stony traces

the void, they filled.

No stories to be told,

No humbling of the core.

Their tale -

untold, it was doomed.

Just footsteps and rustling,

no spectators, no remorse.

The crimson moon,

unharmed and virgin.

The earth too far,

blurry shadows to cast.

Memories, a lost key and the closed door

You’ll end up liking everything about the ‘one’.

Things that you never liked before, songs that you’d never hear otherwise, places that you’d never travelled before, words and ways you’d never spoken, clothes you’d never wanted to wear, food that you never thought you’ll ever eat...

Everything...

Everything about you will be about the ‘one’... till you lose yourself from top to bottom, never to be found again. Never wanting to be rescued from here. This is it. This is where you want to be. This is where you want to live. This is where you want to die. This.

Everything about you will slowly evaporate... your likings, your choices, your friends, your family, your routine... you will live for the ‘one’... and thank God, day and night, for this.

Your dialled call list will start and end with the ‘one’ and every call in between too.

Almost every message in your outbox will shriek the name of the ‘one’

You’ll feel lost without a reason when the ‘one’ is far away, you’ll cry and think life is hell, for no rhyme or song. And then unexpectedly, when you hear or see the ‘one’, you’ll be the happiest and have the biggest smile on your face, no matter how fucked your day has been!

You won’t judge yourself insane even when you’ll find yourself swinging around a tree, thinking about the ‘one’ before you eat your morsels, floating on the clouds and walking on water, lying down on your bed and feeling the ‘one’ holding you and caressing you, imagining the ‘one’ singing all the ‘songs’ for you and dedicating every verse and word to your existence.

When you’ll see two people together, holding hands, you’ll seal your eyes, say a prayer, bless them and then smile tenderly to yourself.

Flowers, breeze, sunlight, angels, hearts, pink, yellow, bright, butterflies, rainbows, fire-place, chocolates, smiles, happiness and lot of other things of these genre will define your reality.

You’ll find a song for you and the ‘one’... the wall-paper of your phone, lap-top and pc and everything possible thing will show the ‘two’ of you together... Your key-chain will have a lucky charm that reminds you of the ‘two’ of you...

You’ll take the journey, even if this is not where you thought you’ll go... you’ll walk miles and miles, under the rain and the sun... the smile will never leave your face.

At times, you’ll question yourself, why am I here? Where am I heading? Is this where I want to go?

And then, you’ll turn around and look at the path you’ve already walked on and you’ll see how far you’ve reached... and then you will smile, close your eyes and think about the ‘one’ and start to walk ahead.

Every bruise will make you smile, every thorn and every stone.

You’ll walk, and keeping walking.

And one day, abruptly, while walking down the street, you’ll find that the key is missing.

Memories, a lost key and the closed door is what you are left with.

Quickly, you’ll turn around and look for the ‘one’...

You’ll find a jaded piece of paper, no date on it though...

And on it, scribbled emotions saying, “The love got over...”

You’ll look for foot-prints... you’ll search for a sign... you’ll want to hear a reason...


Nothing.


You’ll scream, you’ll run, you’ll fall, and you will die.

The impressions of the key are fresh in your palms. Where did it go? When did it fall?

‘But true love never dies...’, you’d heard it somewhere.

Your friends will try their best; your family will be clueless about your struggles.

Blood, dark-circles, a hair-cut, lonely drives, sudden cravings, tears, entangled fingers, darkness, endless blank days, staring the clock and watching every second pass by, vodka, night out with friends, random sex with strangers would be the new you.

You’ll love the soreness. You’ll get pleasure from the tenderness. Especially the part when the skin trembles, as the knife touches the surface and slowly goes deep, deeper within you...

It’s a trip.

Drugs, of any kind, be it sleeping pills or LSD, will occupy your body, more than food.

You will laugh instead of smiling. Whine instead of crying. And you will love it.

People will scare you. Faith, trust, hope and love are abuses, you will say, loud and clear and will make sure that everyone hears it.

Cupid will be killed. And blood will be all over you.

Enjoy the bliss!

Man and kind

Heavy heart,

Frozen mind,

Fading path,

Unseen sight,

Entangled fingers,

Lonely soul,

Stabbed glasses into walls,

Each away from its own

Trembling roots,

The vacuum of earth

Gumption of self

And pride of worth!

No clinging,

No quotes!

In bound,

Out sourced

Living in,

A crazy pose!

Wiser miser

Pretty dough!

Halo jarred,

Stumble on core!

Deep eyes,

Wispy tongue

Slither here,

Slaughter there!

Fate twists,

Time falls!

Holding on

And passing by!

Ceaseless wonder,

Bright eyed vice!

Away from now,

Away somehow!

Fall behind and shine twofold!

Turning away to accepted end

Washed away regrets,

Clogged up veins.

Stroke of white

The celebration of black!

Shadow steals light,

The tremulous whole

Sooner or later,

Thy shall know,

One way street,

Runs both ways

The sound of silence,

Echoes through void

Unmeasured miles

Of a broken road

Shallow well,

Swollen hands

Arrow of soul,

The bend of shoulders.

Harness the calm,

The stage is set.

What more do you want?

What more do you have?

Drifter

Sunlight creeps,

A heart beat heard.

Water to the brim,

Touched and served.

Alone he wandered,

The trembling sky

Disguised and long lost.

Bird below the tree,

The empty cloud staged.

Bird aghast,

Cloud playing sane!

In shade, it glows.

Brightest light for cloud,

This is the world.

Bird, now, hates to fly.

Stained glass

Unhearing faith

Knotted memories,

Crying hope!

Mere humans,

Darkness through light

Speaking eyes and swaying ears.

Jaded eyes,

Unseen path

Glory and rant,

Death and rise!

Sole of a man - sigh of an arm

Endless race,

Reckless mind!

A divine plan for a passer-by!

End of street.

There's always a turn.

Or door,

Or window,

Or you,

With... you

Deep down,

Beyond darkness

Strange light, Flash!

End of the tunnel.

The journey begins...

Marker fades,

Inglorious love

Destruction of self - smile that spreads

Lonely world - full of self

The ruler ruled.

Books burnt, eyes spooned.

The groggy waist,

The modern thought.

Below the bellow,

Burn and wrath!

A faithless night,

The fire burns...

Wanting to ignite

Letting it dwell

The dead of the dark

His sighs are heard

The crossing rat

Bows in a pray

Sheets of skin

Folded and kept

In the arms of light

Voyeur and voyage,

Twisted in rapture!

End of the end,

The break of fate

He wanders alone

He wonders aloud

Stones, twigs and broken self

Spread across

And put to sale!

Price of none,

Put for all.

Beaded head

For an endless dream

A thought of own

Sealed with scarlet

The ship ashore

With sails in see

A grain of sand

Quenches for sea

Wordless mouth,

His eyes thus spoke

A sedated tale

Of kingdom lost

Blades of rain

Wept in anger

The hollow path

Unwound at his door

Peek within

To peek outside

Thawed brain, grilled meat

Moist tongue, swollen limbs

A greater good

A greater God!

A million times I said, A hundred times he heard.

He broke me with an embrace,

Doubting me and my self!

A million times I said,

A hundred times he heard.

I wanted him to listen,

He wanted to speak.

True love breeds no distrust,

I wanted him to know.

He said he knows it all

And gave me away with a shrug!

I snivelled, I trembled, I tried.

But the damage had been done,

By someone out of sight!

“Where did I go wrong?”

I tried to make sense of it all.

“I can effortlessly prove”

And then he killed me down.

A love that does not listen…?

My heart yelled aloud.

The voices in his head

Were stronger than anything around…

A love without trust makes no sense at all

He said it again and I heard,

And agreed with his sound…

I wanted him to see,

In the eyes that gave solace to him

But he chose to stay far.

So that he could not see!

‘This is it! It’s over…”

He blurted with strength and ease!

I was numb and drained,

It’s over, it’s over for him!

So what happens to everything…

That dwelled between us?

A love that is boundless, a love that is true…!

No, I don’t get to choose.

He says he’ll think of it!

Think of love?

Close your eyes and feel.

An island I live on now,

Surrounded by the dreams we had seen.

Where do I go from here?

How did he escape from here?

Numbness dwells with me.

I wait to see the void.