After the storm

*AFTER THE STORM*

3 weeks later and life still chose to walk on the broken road. Yes, the pain of the heart easily qualifies as worst that has ever been known to man-kind. Or so I thought.

Trying hard to get over him with the help of many anti-depressants, chocolates in every possible form, shape, size and colour, litres of vodka and gin, shopping, extra weight, songs and caffeine… I was still sick!

Yes, I tried to work… and I did work too! Surprisingly, sometimes it was great work and most of the times work ended up being washed away with tears. ‘Live with it now’ my mind whispered.

My wet eyelashes drew patterns on the lenses of my spectacles, using them as canvas. ‘Art in vain’ I told myself and tried hard to laugh. More patterns!

Hugging myself at nights… maybe one of them will feel like his… maybe one of them. But nothing will help! Nothing at all…!

And then, when one least expects it… comes the turns…

I saw him.

After a hard day of work, covering up my moist eyes in black shades I was on my way back home with a few colleagues. Feeling secured behind those breakable glasses, I got into the car.
‘California Dreamin’ on such a winter’s daaaaaaaay’… The radio was playing the character of Oracle. Gospel Truth, none the less!

Everyone had a week-end plan. I did too. Kill everyone who seemed to be in love!

Sigh. Only if it cured.

I tried to sink into the seat and craved for it to absorb me… deep within it.

My colleague suggested, ‘Yoo Hoo, anyone from some hottie…?’ She meant coffee.
‘I’m game…’ I whined.

The signal before the café and I was peeping out, observing the ‘others’ and trying to find someone from my side of the horizon. And then… right then… he drove away in his car.

Not behind black shades… there he was… going away again!

I didn’t know what breathing was right then and the only muscle that made its existence felt was my heart.

My neck sub-consciously made my head turn to keep him occupied in my sight as long as I could. If only it would turn 360 degrees…!

‘Someone you know…?’ my colleague inquired.

The glares were professionally hiding my emotions behind them as I allowed him to move away from my vision.

‘Just a sprain in my neck…’ I mumbled and made sure that I did not choke.

I craved to yell... But only if he could hear me...

The cracks in the dam were increasing and I needed to be alone.

‘Could you pull over…? I need to meet a friend…’

I took a taxi and allowed it to disappear in the city of blinding light as my tears were back to where they belonged.

How to survive THE HEART-ACHE...

Survival ‘guide’ and How to Fight ‘the’ Heartache… (We all need it…)

So when you know that things have gone beyond understanding and you can’t TAKE IT ANYMORE… When the heart ache is barely bearable and nothing… Just NOTHING makes sense at all… All that you need to do are these things…
- Take a cold shower directly on your face (eyes closed obviously) and listen to the storm building within you.
- Take your i-pod and go for a run, and keep running till you hear your hamstrings begging you to stop. Physical pain reduces the heartache (for a while atleast)
- Have an entire can of whipped cream and relish and be loud about how you feel… Go ‘ummmmmmmmm’
- Take a walk by the beach and let your eyes look at the sky as you walk… No, you won’t fall…
- Listen to Simon and Garfunkle… Heals! Heals! Heals!
- Don’t curse the loser… Bless him/her and smile… (*sigh* I know it’s difficult… but one can TRY)
- Go to the grocery store, shop like there is no tomorrow and don’t forget to admire every little thing that you buy
- Don’t even bother listening to sad, lovey-dovey songs. That goes for movies as well as books. Don’t go close to anything that will remind you of ‘worldly love’
- TALK to your closest friends and cry, if need be.
- Do you how many steps do you have to take from your home to your favourite den…? …NO!
- So get out and get going and find out… you need to know a lot about ‘your favourite things’
- Buy flowers for yourself from those lonely street children and then take them for a walk and buy them ice-cream and try and get to know innocence… J (You can do this even without having a heart break…! ;)
- Play ‘Blue Suede Shoes’ and dance like there is no tomorrow. (You might end up crying while doing it, but DON’T STOP)
- Catch up on all the gossip that you have been missing and think how to spread it further
- Develop a HUGE CRUSH on a celebrity and feel good about it…! Fuck yeah!
- Text message all the people who mean the most to you and let them know that they do… (You’ll end up feeling more loved than ever)
- Cook a homely meal and call you BFF’s home for a VIP lunch/dinner
- Go to a bar and try all that you haven’t Psst Psst only stuff that is on the menu :P… (Note – please take a friend along you who can trust to drop you home safely)
- Ask your boss to give you more work… And work like a BITCH… Do it all…! And treat yourself to Mocha truffle after a hard day of work
- Buy some body butter and (cherry blossom one’s by BODYSHOP) make yourself feel goooooooood…!
- Watch ‘The Sound Of Music’ and sing along LOUD…! (Very Helpful)
- Lie on your couch and let your head touch the floor and breathe…
- Adopt a pet… and shower all your love… They deserve it more… Trust me!
- Read Paulo Coelho’s Manual of the Warrior of Light (Don’t ask… READ!)
- Paint a tee saying ‘Romeo and Juliet suck!’
- Have the image of a dead cupid as your wallpaper. (It’s available on google.com)
- Listen to music, so loud, that all you hear is silence
- Have 5 Jolly Rancher lollipops a day and suck it loud and slurrrp it up!!! And don’t feel guilty about it!
- Hug your mom and cry your heart out and tell her, “Please don’t ask a thing… Just be there… Please…’
- Light up your room with aroma candles and then ask your friends to come over for PJ’s
- Throw a surprise kitty for your mom and her closest friends and watch her being happy.
- Think of the loser… every time you go for a leak and say his/her name loud and say, “This is exactly what you deserve” and laugh like a witch…!